Peshwari Naan

boggy 69 writes on 27th February 2007...

Then led to a tequila bar, we proceeded to sample the local beverages as it would have been rude not to. A trip to Tesco intervened to buy cans, sushi and crisps and a trip to the National Express coach station ensued.

On the back of the National Express, we sang, drank, played cards and shared our insights into existence. We then arrived at Leeds, where a National Express coach driver accused us of perhaps having engaged in visiting the local taverns. Of course we have not, we proclaimed, we merely are in high spirits from our excursion and Matt decided to point out that the driver was under a contractual duty to take us. A debate on the finer points of contract law commenced, which was settled when I suggested that we would sit quietly at the back and not share our enthusiasm with the remaining passengers. Back on board we climbed and finally arrival home! The aforementioned coach driver then proceeded to enquire as to the relationship status of a lovely lady we perchance acquired on the coach. Unfortunately for the driver the woman was rather normal and suggested that she would rather not engage him. Happenchance that we pointed out he was a gimp.

And then home where sleep was obtained and hangovers got through.

Duncan Gardham writes on 21st February 2007...

An alleged suicide bomber was caught on CCTV dressed in a burqa and carrying a handbag as he allegedly tried to escape London.

Prosecutors claim Yassin Omar, who is 6ft 2ins tall, was pictured dressed head to toe in a black burqa and carrying a beige handbag over his left arm, as he walked beside another woman in Islamic dress.

He is said to have arrived at Golders Green in North London on the afternoon of July 22, the day after the failed bomb attacks on London transport, and caught a National Express coach to Birmingham at 6.20pm.

Footage released by police today allegedly showed Omar wondering among oblivious passengers after arriving at Digbeth coach station at 9.15pm.

He found a bench where he sat waiting for 45 minutes before several people in a red Nissan Sunny car arrived to collect him.

CCTV images from National Express Digbeth Coach Station simply click this link to view Yassin Omar, a National Express passenger.

Tall Scientist writes on 15th

February 2007...

I got to the bus with plenty of time to spare, but unfortunately lost my helium balloons from Pizza Hut in Victoria Station. Then I wasn’t in the first few people to get on the bus so some girl pinched the front seat (having very long legs means sitting in a cramped bus seat is not the most comfortable, and the front seats have the most room). This girl then proceeded to push her seat back (I won the first battle, but then fell asleep when she did it again, grrr) to make what little legroom I had to start off with completely disappear. Thanks for that, cow.
So, the bus sets off at 11:30 pm, fine, I fall asleep after a while, only to wake up an hour later to the bus driver calling his mate to say that there’s a problem with the fuel and he’s hoping he can get to the next service station before the bus dies. About five minutes later, the bus dies. In the middle of nowhere, somewhere near Reading on the M4. Oh Great. So we sit, on the side of the motorway, while the trucks blow past us, and our emergency hazards on. Fair play to the driver, he did what he could to solve the problem, but there wasn’t much he could do except wait with the rest of us for rescue. About 10 minutes later, a bus stops by us. Hopes flare until
it transpires the bloke’s going to Swindon, Chippenham and Gloucester. Not much good for a group of tired people who want to get to Bristol. It transpires that the people coming to rescue us are coming in a van, and all the way from Bristol, which is a good hour or so driving away. We sat, and then sat some more, and then eventually I probably did sleep. An hour and a half (2am) after we pulled to the side of the motorway, another bus turns up. This one, it transpires, is going to Swansea and will drop us off on the way. And it has enough seats on it! Hooray! So I quickly get off the bus, in the hope I can get a better seat that isn’t being crushed by the (insert
rude word here) in front. We get on said bus, and the driver starts being very randomly rude to my fellow passengers – telling them they can’t even have a very small rucksack on the bus (luckily I got away with my heavily laden handbag) and it has to be stored in the hold (?!?). I get my space at the front of the bus, somehow, absolutely no legroom whatsoever on this bus, when someone gives me back my rather lovely gloves I left on the previous bus (whoops). Thankyou, kind man.
Finally, we set off on our trip back to Bristol, the driver telling the bloke on the opposite side of me to get his seatbelt on straight away, and we leave the poor other driver to wait for recovery, which still hasn’t arrived. The driver listens to cheesy radio all the way, but I sleep. An hour later (3am) we finally arrive, tired and annoyed, at Bristol Bus Station, after an extraordinary route round Bristol that almost takes us to the train station and annoys the bus driver further. Some guy pipes up, “I guess we’re not going to Bristol University?”. The terse Welsh bus driver replies, “You guessed right”. How polite. I don’t know what happened next as I just got off the bus, happy to be a bit closer to home. The guy next to me (who, it has to be said, snored pretty much all the way home) comes out of the bus station shouting about the bus driver. I start undoing my bike, realising that I have no lights. Ah well, I’d rather cycle home than attempt to walk it at this time of night. And then, the most random thing happens. The ensuing conversation takes place:
Random man: Can you give me a lift?
Me: What?!?
RM: Can you give me a lift?
Me: On my bicycle? Are you crazy?
RM: It’s no problem, I’ll just sit on the back.
Me: I’m sorry, I can hardly push myself along on this thing, let alone anyone else.
I get home at 3:45, on my own, and finally get to my nice bed. I get 4 hours sleep before I have to go to work again. National Express is not in my good books today.

cry me a beer writes on 26th January 2007...

law tings
i have to book my brother a ticket to come down from aberdeen to london
cos aberdeen doesnt have internet

megabus had no more seats. so i have to try National DeathXpress [just round xmas there was a fatal national express coach crash on the london to aberdeen route... which really upset my mum cos of the number of times shes put my brother on the bus and waved good bye. it really brought home the risk factor involved]

national express are bastards but anyway. im checking the £1 insurence cover box for sure - its the least i can do. I hate him but he's funny so i dont REALLY want him to die

as a lawyer - in IT law our lecturer is always telling us how we always just check the 'i agree' box to terms and conditions and never read them and for all we know it could say something like Bill Gates has the right to your first born... or something

so i had a go at browsing these t's and c's. usually no one should ever bother cos theyre so alarming and DUMB - but this just doesnt sound right - an under 16 year olds subsequent death is worth only £1,000?

SECTION 2 - PERSONAL ACCIDENT

YOU ARE COVERED

For the following benefits, which will be paid to you or your legal personal representative, if you have a personal accident during your trip which, at the end of 12 months of that accident, is the sole cause of your consequent death or disablement.
1) Death - £10,000
2) Loss of one or more Limbs, total and irrecoverable loss of sight in one or both eyes or permanent total disablement - £20,000
NOTE - If you are aged under 16 at the time of the accident the death benefit will be limited to £1,000 and the permanent total disablement benefit will not apply .
Our aggregate liability under this section is £20,000 per insured person.

Mike writes on 21st January 2007...

The next morning dawned wet and extremely windy as had been forecast and it was quite a breezy trip to Victoria coach station for our 2hour 10min ride back to Thetford.At precisely 1.00pm our coach set off with 13 other souls and our driver John.Lyn and I settled back for the journey.Within a few minutes things started to go wrong as the Embankment was closed which resulted in a lengthy delay to get us back on track.I really didnt expect to see Big Ben twice in such a short period of time.We were now over an hour late.Approaching the M11 we could see the warning signs,and hoped they were referring to the M25 but no such luck the M11 was closed between junctions 6 and 10 so the driver decided to go on the M25 to take the A12,guess what that was closed,so back we come past the M11 to take the A10,guess what the slip road was closed,so we carry on to come off on the next exit to come back and approach the A10 from another angle ,via Enfield!!!!! .It is now 6.00pm and we are only about 12miles from where we started.After crawling through Enfield(NICE TOWN!!!!)we approach the A10 along with all the traffic in the South of England,guess what thats also closed.Now I have a pretty good sense of direction but I have no idea where we are.John our driver has during this time been trying to reach his office to tell them to send out a relief coach with driver as he is out of hours,guess what, no they are not closed but all he gets is a recorded message.He is now really pissed off especially as he was only driving for a favour to cover a driver off sick, and he is supposed to be taking his wife out to dinner,and now she has to get a take away instead.This mobile phone banter was quite interesting and we were all giving him advice as to handle the domestic situation which was developing.
Anyway back to the driving.We were somewhere near a place called Hertford near the A10 crawling along at a snails pace when John had a sudden rush of blood to the head and decided to turn round,now whether he had seen other drivers do this I have no idea,anyway he proceeded to cross the grass central reservation and promptly got stuck axle deep in mud straddling 4 lanes of road leaving only grass strips on each side for traffic to get round.Now I have never seen a 40foot 10wheeler stuck in such a position,but my reaction to his efforts would have brought the same reaction as that of a number of motorists "YOU F.......... WANKER"..All John said was I'm going to get nicked for this.Then he hatched a cunning plan for all us passengers to say that he had to swerve to avoid a reckless driver when the boys in blue turned up.Well it wasn't long before they arrived and I do believe he managed to convince them as to how he managed to avoid a nasty accident save the lives of all his passengers and prevent the coach from being written off.All the time this was going on the boys in blue were trying to keep the traffic moving,until they directed a huge artic to pass us,and yes that got stuck, so now we had one road down to a crawl and the other completely blocked,and by the way the police car had also broken down,his blue flashing lights were no more.But before long another had arrived and proceeded to organise a tow truck.We weren't allowed off as it was deemed too dangerous so we sat there continuing to watch the unfolding cabaret.Passing motorists from the other side were continuing to abuse anybody they could and offer advice to both police and John like" try pushing it you assholes"Have you ever tried pushing a 10ton monster axle deep in mud.Mind you I would have probably offered the same advice.Anyway to cut a long story short as this is becoming as long to write as our journey home took, the tow truck arrived and within minutes a team of highly skilled men soon had us all on our way.John had arranged a relief coach to come and pick us up, as he was by now definitely out of hours.It never turned up and after waiting for about 15 mins he decided to complete the journey himself.The rest of the trip was uneventful and we arrived at Thetford at 10..pm some 9 hours after starting out.John didn't get a tip and I don't care if he even got his takeaway.I have written to National Express, but not in such detail,and I don't expect to get a reply.

Arden Long writes on 7th January 2007...

My (middle) brother, in the meanwhile, was having to arrange collection of himself and his entire christmas shopping (one small cuddly toy - honestly the man has no idea how to shop) from a pub in Coventry, having been involved in an accident on his National Express coach. Apparently the coach driver had been banned one week before hand until the outcome of an investigation following a crash on exactly the same spot.

The local publican, who naturally benefitted from both accidents by having his hostelry full of dazed albanians and single mothers, informed him that the driver had some kind of fit or seizure (although he referred to it as a "spaz attack" - how utterly, beautifully non-pc!) the first time, and naturally was arrested on the spot on this later occasion.

Had I been in the vicinity (anywhere north of Southampton, if I am any judge) my mother would have insisted I collect the little darling, but as I wasn't, my youngest sibling drew the short straw.

Not according to middle bruv, who claimed it for himself. Apparently after twenty miles of number three's driving, he wanted to be back on the eppileptic bus, figuring that his chances of survival woukld be much better with Grand-Mal Gordon behind the wheel.

Now, in the last week or so, we have all learned that National express coaches are safe as houses, especially houses next to police stations in Baghdad or painted with the flag of the union* in an american airforce bombing zone. They are only in danger when faced with obstacles such as that dangerous accident black-spot - the M4-M25 slip road (w-n) and the like. It's good of the company to check that the rest of the fleet are roadworthy, but how do we know whether the drivers are?

And why, you ask, does it have anything to do with me?

At this moment, I am om the upper deck of the NXL561 london-skipton doing 70mph on the M1.

If I don't get there alive, you can have my CD collection and PSP, providing you come to the funeral.

Still, Christmas was good...

Arden.

Stephen Clynes writes on 6th January 2007...

I read in my newspaper yesterday about the National Express coach crash. I read the story with great interest but this section made me wonder...

Last night National Express said its entire fleet of 12 double-decker coaches would be withdrawn from service immediately as a precaution. The vehicles will be given safety checks.

...why was this, I asked myself?

I know that all coaches in the UK have a safety check every 28 days and I have no doubts whatsoever about the safety of double decker coaches. These double deckers coaches are only 2ft taller than single decker coaches but look much bigger. I do not believe they are less safe than single decker coaches and maybe safer because they have an extra tag axle placing 2 extra tyres in contact with the road surface. Then the penny dropped, literally. National Express are facing aggressive competition on their market share in the Uk from Megabus . From the passengers point of view both operators provide a keenly priced service between major UK cities. National Express operate around 600 coaches with only 12 coaches being Neoplan Skyliner double deckers. The rest of the National Express fleet are single decker coaches. Megabus operate 50 Neoplan Skyliner double deckers plus some other types of double decker coach. The public will obviously be a little nervous about buying a coach ticket at the moment and if one operator withdraws all it's double decker coaches whilst the other only operates double decker coaches guess which company the nervous punter will choose? Make a statement to the waiting media about "its entire fleet of 12 double-decker coaches would be withdrawn from service immediately as a precaution. The vehicles will be given safety checks." and that statement plants the seeds of doubt in the potential passenger. I do not believe there are any safety issues with double decker coaches but that National Express are using this accident to gain a commercial advantage over their obvious competitor.

Another issue did not arise in my newspaper but I am sure it will in time. I believe that these coaches are fitted with CCTV with cameras recording not only the forward motion of the coach but the actions of all the passengers. I expect the Police will be using these images to prosecute the driver for causing death by dangerous driving. The Police can also fine any passenger £30 for failing to wear a seatbelt whilst seated. The real conflict will begin when the insurance companies throw out any claims from passengers who were not wearing a seatbelt. The ambulance chasers will not like it one bit but the CCTV makers website claims "Insurance claims - as the trend towards no win, no fee legal representation increases, so too has the incidence of trivial and spurious insurance claims. The transport industry is particularly prone and is costing the industry hundreds of thousands of pounds, mainly in out of court settlements. Apart from the cost of road accidents themselves, (in which front facing cameras help to provide valuable evidence of blame and therefore reduce insurance costs) false claims from passengers are increasing. One major bus company claims to have recovered the cost of installing CCTV on its fleet within 18 months simply through the elimination of spurious insurance claims."

Accidents will happen and many can be avoided. I do not believe that the deaths and injuries sustained would have happened had all the passengers been wearing their seatbelts. The photographs in the press of the coach show relatively little damage to the outside body of the coach. A broken mirror and windows should not lead to the death of 2 passengers and amputation of limbs.